From the beginning, you will be using the following three tools, for exploration, that enable you to expand beyond any limitations or challenges in life stage or starting point.
They are your breath, imagination, and observation. These tools are freely available to you all the time.
To begin if you can start by spending 1-10 minutes per day just breathing. Not anything else just returning to noticing what happens when you breathe. What sensations you experience, what you feel and hear.
With your imagination each day, focus on kindness coming into you and going out from you. It does not matter how long you do it for or how often – just at least once. Be creative, as examples one time it may be as a colour beam, another time as a little animal.
Observing is a great teacher -it is part of feedback development systems in our body and nature. Observe how you do these exercises, what feelings come up, what thoughts- are they very similar or different. Does the setting for doing the exercises illicit different thoughts and feelings or does it make a minor difference? Don’t judge- just observe and notice. The other aspect of observation is to find a plant or tree and spend some time to observe its living activity. How it copes with its environment.
Sections From the Book
When you hear about being well or ‘wellbeing’ many
different ideas and images of what wellbeing means may
be conjured up, as you have been exposed to so many
advertising images and other information. Allow me to give
you a clear, holistic picture of wellbeing and then help you
progressively increase your wellbeing every day.
Wellbeing is a process rather than a stationary destination.
It is a way of being in order to really experience life fully.
To be well is about our capacity to respond to and interact
with our social and physical environment with energy and
pleasure, each day.
The potential for wellbeing is waiting inside of you all the
time. In each moment you can be well. It is always in the
present time. The key is to know that it is within you,
available abundantly if you pause and give it the attention,
resources and space it needs to display itself.
Being well requires your co-operation on all three levels of
mind, body and spirit in such a way that the needs on each
level are being met in a harmonious way. An alternative
way of expressing it might be that the survival, emotional,
thinking, meaning and seeking parts of you are working
together in order for you to enjoy life.
We will be looking at the components and mechanisms of
how wellbeing is built and sustained, and how to take in
the elements, energy and information you really need. We
will be exploring how your mind interacts with your body
in a coordinated way through the different parts of your
brain, nervous system and hormones in order to experience
life. The dynamic friendship between your mind and body
sets the first tone of that experience. We will discuss how
to restore that friendship if neglect, disappointment and
frustration have disrupted it.
The key to your wellbeing is in transforming the quality
of the experience of the things you need to do every day.
Wellbeing, joy, contentment and happiness can literally be
built one breath, step and mouthful of food, conversation
or smile at a time.
Wellbeing is not defined by a disease process
Your wellbeing reserves may be challenged by being sick
from a cold or having a chronic disease. But the presence
of these challenges does not mean that you can’t experience
wellbeing. Managing them appropriately and developing
inner reserves for coping will definitely help you to enjoy
wellbeing throughout your whole life.
I know at times having a diagnosis to explain the phenomena
someone has been experiencing can be a relief; however, it
is extremely important for wellbeing that our identity and
wellbeing are not defined by a disease process. For example,
it is better to say someone needs to manage their blood sugar
levels very consciously than call them a diabetic. Manage
them responsibly we must, ignoring them and hoping for
the best does not increase our wellbeing.
‘It’s far more important to know what person the disease
has than what disease the person has.’ —Hippocrates
1
What We Learn from
the Beginning of Life
On our search for our ‘well-being’, understanding the
process of the very beginning of our life as a ‘human-being’
is key. First, let’s look at the very beginning of life of a
seed that is planted in the ground. Whatever the type of
plant, the seed will always send roots downwards through
the ground and its stem upwards towards the light. It will
vigorously look for the elements it needs and, following its
inherent seed information or inner program, it will then
process and transform them into itself.
The quality of the seed, the soil, the synchronicity between
the local climate and its needs for water and warmth, its
ability to access light by whether it’s shaded or not, the
local insect population and many other factors together will
affect the seed and plant’s growth and development. If it is
vigorous enough it may be able to get past the shade; if not
What We Learn from the Beginning of Life
2
it will be stunted, not reaching its potential, and the same
goes if its roots can’t spread far. Herein are the clues to what
is required for us human beings to grow to completion and
full wellness.
What about us humans?
Now let’s look more closely at the beginning of your life—
the coming together of your unique parcel of information
and the universal life energy, in your first environment …
your mother. Looking there will reveal some important
principles.
Scientists are fast developing a more in-depth understanding
of the minute fine tuning of the definite steps in the first
three weeks of life. But there is still more to understand.
One does get a sense of the respect they have for what they
are witnessing. They do know it is orderly and controlled,
within tight parameters, through each clear step.
Along its three-day journey through the fallopian tube, from
nutrients and genetic instructions contributed by the egg
and sperm, the embryo divides to form two cells, then four
cells, then eight. At the eight-cell stage, through a process
scientists still don’t understand, the embryo somehow
activates its genes. From this point on, the embryo is on
its own to follow its unique genetic destiny. If anything
interferes with gene activation, the embryo will die.
As it is entering the uterus it has divided to become sixteen
identical cells. In the next 48 hours it will become 100 cells
Sustainable Wellbeing
3
that are two types. The outer ones will become the placenta,
which will connect the embryo to the uterus of the mother.
The inner ones divide to form the amniotic cavity and a flat
disc with two layers of cells that is the embryo.
Once the embryo is embedded in the wall of the uterus,
and ensured a supply of oxygen and nutrients from the
mother’s bloodstream to survive, it starts preparing for a
transformation that takes place during the third week of
development. The embryo’s genes orchestrate, in a very
sophisticated process, reconfiguring itself to form three new
cell types into inner, middle and outer layers.
Each embryonic cell is now destined to follow a specific
developmental pathway. Endoderm cells will go on to form
the liver, pancreas and gastrointestinal tract. Cells in the
mesoderm develop into the heart and blood vessels, bone,
muscle and kidneys. The ectoderm will become the central
and peripheral nervous systems, sensory organs, skin and
hair.
During this period, the quality of the mother’s blood supply
is very critical to the long-term health of this new life. Having
been activated and cooperating with the environment
supplied by its mother and universal life force, this new life
grows to emerge nine months later into a new environment.
In this story of all of us who have been born, we can see
how there are dynamics at work, which are guided by an
intelligent direction to go through each stage. You could
say the embryonic cell was following its inner program or
template.
What We Learn from the Beginning of Life
4
The outcome at each stage, however, is influenced by:
• the quality of the supply of nutrients, energy and
information
• the embryo’s response to this supply and
• other as yet unknown factors from the environmental
setting and the embryo’s template.
So there is the environment supply, the embryo’s information
and the relationship between them to produce the outcome.
It is also interesting that at one stage at least half of the
embryo’s resources are allocated to securing its place in its
environment via the placenta and the amniotic fluid. The
embryo is doing all it can to modify the environment for its
survival and development. It is not just passively sitting in
it. This dynamic interchange between us, the life forces and
our environment continues throughout our life.
Responsive, responsible and balanced
One extra detail is very important to take into account:
The environment is divided between the external and the
internal environment. In both parts there are things we can
see and things we can’t. There are things we can influence
completely and things that are difficult to influence. We
need to be able to take in the elements we require from
our internal and external environment and process and
transform them into ourselves, and then contribute back
into these environments. The more we can acknowledge
with respect the universal life energy within us, as well as
our unique energy template, the more we will be able to live
in a responsive, responsible way towards them as well as our
environments.
We may be all in the same physical location, but our
experience of it will be very different as we take it into us
through our internal environment. The key is whether we
are maintaining the delicate balance of the influence of the
external environment on our internal environment with our
unique energy.
Traditional cultures used to spend a lot of time sharing
stories, music and dance to connect with each other for
protection and to support each other in processing their
daily experiences. In modern culture we seem to have
increasingly more external solutions and neglect internal
processing and seeking mutual support.
All this requires relationships, and it is the quality of those
relationships that determine your level of wellbeing.
The other point to keep in your awareness is how much your
cells worked together in the beginning to cooperate with
each other and the universal life force … and this continues
throughout your whole life. We may understand some of the
inner communications like nerves and hormones, but there
are many more that we continue to discover. Your life and
wellbeing depend on your relationships, both within and
amongst all the different cells and systems at every level of
your being. Your life and wellbeing also depends upon your
relationships with other people and with the environment.
What is Wellbeing and Wellbeing Capacity?
Wellbeing’s simplest explanation is having sufficient
capacity to meet your needs, combined with a deep level of
satisfaction, even in the midst of life’s challenges. Satisfaction
comes from an engagement with your environment from
deep within you, leading also to creativity and joy. Try to
think of your wellbeing in terms of making a large container
in which peace, vibrancy, contentment, love and joy can be
overflowing or radiating from.
Capacity is about having sufficient space to process life in
such a way that it gives you energy and nourishment to
function and engage in the activities you need and want
to do. You have a wellbeing capacity chamber that you are
looking after. This container is capable of changing shape and
size to accommodate the many challenges that life throws
at it, to deliver the outcome of wellbeing. Throughout the
rest of this book we will explore the different components
of this container as well as highlight the opportunities you
have to impact the quality of each one. You will find certain
concepts mentioned again in different contexts. This is
because there is much interweaving of the various influences
on our wellbeing and looking at the same component from a
different angle will show more clearly that sometimes it’s in
the driver seat setting the agenda and sometimes it’s being
influenced more by other factors.
For example, you can look at stress and your nutrition
levels from at least two different perspectives. You may feel
stressed because you don’t have the nourishment you need
to function properly, and as soon as your nutrient levels
are restored you feel well as you adapt more easily to the
stressors. Or maybe on paper you should be having sufficient
nutrition in your diet, but you may not be digesting food
properly because of stress. Perhaps your enzyme-making
inheritance makes certain foods difficult to digest and thus
you are not absorbing the full amount you need from your
food. It will be a journey to connect with your digestive
capacity’s response to stress and what foods and situations
for eating suits you best to have the level of nutrients you
need.
Space
The simple concept of space is profound in its implication of
how we deal with everything. If I asked you to sort out a box
of distinctly different files on your lap, you would find that a
much more frustrating experience than if you had a big table
that you could spread everything out on in clear piles. If I
asked you to do it in 30 minutes, it would be more stressful
than if you had 2 hours. If I made you listen to jack hammer
noise rather than music you enjoyed, it would be harder.
Imagine that you do have the time, space or room to spread
out and see things clearly…
You have the time and space to take it slow and have
moments to pause and think about what you are doing…
You have the space of not having an annoying sound in the
background disturbing your focus…
The same quantity of water in a cup may fill it to the brim
and be easily spilt, but in a bigger container it is easily
managed. The same task becomes a completely different
experience.
You may ask, ‘Where am I going to find extra time or space?’
The answer lies in learning how to reset the imbalance of
resource sharing within your systems, relaxing the tension
in your body and changing the quality of activities you have
to do.
Practise kindness and gratitude—you can be
filled with them and still have space for life.
Collaborative relationships
Central to your wellbeing is to establish collaborative
relationships between all the different systems of organisation
and function within your body as well as within your social
and physical environment. Collaboration includes respectful
co-operation, integration—the bringing together of separate
different but interconnected energies and processes via
feedback and communication mechanisms, harmony and
rhythm. This is a method or way as well as a goal.
Humans process our experiences through combining our
rational and creative intelligence with the innate qualities
we possess that are similar or the same as minerals, plants
and animals. That is, our primal instinct for survival is
combined with the social need for connection, pleasure
and meaning—from being part of something bigger than
ourselves—and our creative, imaginative impulses.
We have within us energy and information processing
systems of immense sophistication and capability. The more
they are nourished and enabled to work together smoothly
the greater your wellbeing.
The way geographers describe ecosystems and the whole
planet biosphere could easily be transferred to us. We have
a digestive system, immune system, circulatory system,
nervous system and so on with complex feedback and
organisational processes. They have various responsibilities
to keep us both surviving and thriving. Many activities
continue without our continual conscious input, on autopilot
from the combination of our unique blueprint plus our
accumulated associations and memories. These activities as
demonstrated by biofeedback can be further refined by our
growing awareness and consciousness.
Your wellbeing outflows, or radiates, from within your
core wellbeing chamber. It feeds into your satisfaction and
supports your structure and function. This is analogous to
how music can be considered an outflow from an orchestra
or band. The quality of the music comes from many
components. The talent and capability of each musician,
the quality and type of their instruments as well as their
ability to harmonise together all contribute to the sound.
This also leads us to the subjective nature of evaluating our
wellbeing. An analogy might be in our choice of music;
whether it suits our taste or not influences our enjoyment
of the music. Incompetent musicians, as well, can hinder
the enjoyment of a song normally enjoyed, while good
musicians can make many types of music more pleasurable.
At any point in your life, whether the needs around your
personal priorities, expectations and perspectives can be
met, will impact your feeling of wellbeing.
Wellbeing is not about everything being perfect. Although
we try to seek the best way we can to avoid or manage
sickness or injuries, through the ‘perfect’ diet or exercise
program, things will happen. So it’s important to invest in
your ability to cope and recover from life’s challenges, digest
the experiences, and grow in both wisdom and empathy.
Your unique pattern
Critical to your wellbeing is your capacity to stay aligned
with your unique pattern of potential growth and
development, while interacting with your environment in
both a responsive and influencing way. Your unique pattern
comes from two family histories coming together plus more.
Your unique pattern is part of a bigger pattern.
Australian Aboriginal art, which deeply demonstrates this,
has been embraced as an awakening to our connectedness to
everyone and everything. Every stroke and dot is significant
in the whole picture. We have a greater significance than any
of us truly realise. Being the best you, developing yourself
and contributing who you are, is really important. Every
one of us matters in the human race, as we carry something
unique and special that makes us all richer. Honouring
who you are as well as honouring those around you is a very
important aspect of wellbeing, and this includes our global
wellbeing.
There is a delicate balance between serving
attentively the needs of others as well as
ourselves, and we must attend to both.
Circles of care
In nature we can see many circles and spirals. They are not
only beautiful but geometrically and mathematically they
enable stable, sustainable structure, function, growth and
development. For example, the oceans circle the globe and
rhythmically lap at the earth’s edges.
When we breathe we make a circle with the air coming into
us and going out. This is a vital cycle for our life, and all
of our systems benefit when this happens rhythmically and
smoothly. There are whole books just on this subject and
powerful therapies helping people to achieve freer breathing.
There is an inner circle between us and our environment,
but we have many other inner and outer ones. We will
discuss this more in Chapter 6 Live with Rhythm.
We all have a value of one (1), with every being in
relationship with every other being. So we love and care for
ourselves as well as others. It’s not about caring for others
and not yourself, or the other way around; that is, caring
for yourself and not others. It’s about both together—then
it is sustainable.
The ultimate circle is the one where we go inside and discover
who we are, bring ourselves out into our environment, and
then bring more into ourselves from the environment to
allow more of ourselves to be expressed collaboratively and
comfortably. To raise the quality of your caring, circulate
your attention with listening, scanning, and connecting to
yourself and your environment to check if anything needs
adjusting or attending to with more actions.
Care stands for:
Consistent
Attention
Refreshes
Everything
How to increase your wellbeing capacity
We have touched on several elements necessary for building
your wellness capacity, such as space and collaboration.
In the following chapters we will explore the necessary
components, resources, processing and allocation required
to build your capacity for wellness.
Your wellness capacity foundation components are:
• Space: sufficient time and a feeling of spaciousness,
inside and out, from a lack of congestion. This
reflects your reserves and the free and appropriate
allocation of resources for adaption.
• connections with others and your environment
• regular renewing and repairing from having
adequate resources and a balanced nervous system
• sufficient supply of the resources, energy and
information needed for structure, function and
satisfaction by:
• gathering the elements or nourishment you need
• managing the transition zones and processing
• allocating resources appropriately
• clearing waste away efficiently
The following chapters will help you actively enhance your
ability to do these fundamentals well. All the ensuing
suggestions feed into each other and combine to build a
momentum towards reaching a tipping point in creating
a perfect size container, one where wellbeing becomes easy
to sustain. Leaving out one part can put a greater strain on
building the momentum and is, therefore, harder to sustain.